Archive for October, 2013

Drabble: I sure appreciate the way you’re working with me.

“I… I th… thought you’d left,” I stammered.

“I came back,” he replied nonchalantly. “It’s not as if I died.” He looked at me accusingly.

“Well, I…”

Such lively eyes staring at me from a deathly face were unnerving. I gave in, and went to get some textbooks.

“Let’s work on something together,” he suggested. “My brain is open.” Indeed it was, but I tried not to look.

Uncertain though I was about the feasibility of living and undead working together, I could not refuse his offer of collaboration. And that’s how I got a late Erdős number of one.

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Hotel Bacon (Michelle Branch parody)

This is to be sung to the tune of Hotel Paper by Michelle Branch.

I like mostly just hotel bacon.
Knowing the leftovers would never be consumed.
Raised, erased, their flesh is too tasty to leave here.
so I try not to eat meat but I do.
But I do.

No need to feed pigs the grain for my breakfast.
Sow means, reap none from the future; it’s theft.
I try to stop but it’s free to get this.
I know tomorrow there’ll be nothing left.

And I wanted to be
living in places I could keep living.
But I want luxury,
so I’ll take this hotel, and all it’s serving.

This turned out to cost more than I bargained for,
and I can’t stay in this place another day.
Forgive me; now that I’m baconless like you, I like you.
I just realised it way too late.

And I wanted to be
Living in places I could keep living.
But I got luxury,
So I took this hotel, and all its servings.
(Maybe this temporary retreat is surrender.)

My life’s mostly just hotel bacon.

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