Why Not All of Randall Munroe’s Suggestions Should be Implemented on JoCo Cruise Crazy 4

On JoCo Cruise Crazy 3, xkcd’s Randall Munroe told us all about the ball pit in his apartment, and finished by telling us how much it would cost to fill the entire ship with playpen balls. Somebody in the audience asked if we could have a ball pit in the game room next year. Some time ago, the powers that be announced that there will indeed be a ball pit in an inner cabin on JoCo Cruise Crazy 4. Later it became clear that this was all just a ploy to help Paul and Storm fulfill Kickstarter rewards for their next album, Ball Pit, but I’m not complaining.

Randall Munroe also told us how long we could survive if JoCo Cruise Crazy 4 were filled to the top with meat, and then how long we’d survive if we only had the other cruise passengers (which are conveniently made of meat) to feast on:

I’ve come to realise that this would not be a good idea to implement on JoCo Cruise Crazy 4. That is to say, it has the potential to be more awesome than we realised at the time, but it would considerably disrupt the programmed entertainment.

A few days ago, Randall made some calculations about the number of humans required to sustain a Tyrannosaurus rex. Apparently only half an adult a day. If there were a single T-rex on the cruise, then given the ratio of Sea Monkeys (JoCo Cruise Crazy attendees) to other passengers and crew, a Sea Monkey would have less chance of getting eaten by the King of the Tyrant Lizards than being chosen Monarch of the Seas.

However, assuming Randall was using short scales when he said ‘six hundred billion calories’, if the entire ship were filled to the top with meat, that would be enough to sustain a population of 2.5 million (2 500 000) T-Rexes for the duration of the cruise. And one of them would sleep in the meatball pit.

On a related note, since Randall expressed surprise at the size of elephants, it should be noted that a newborn elephant (or at least, the newborn Kai-Mook, which is my reference whenever I need to convert a measurement to newborn elephants) weighs only 80kg, or the same as Randall’s/Ryan North’s average human. So elephants grow from human-size to T-rex size. I’m not sure about T-Rex hatchlings, but one unsourced web page suggested they’d be the size of house cats. I bet the cute little raptorcats would be the darlings of the internet.

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  1. #1 by bill ware on February 12, 2014 - 10:32 pm

    how might I get “robot choir?”


    • #2 by Angela Brett on March 16, 2014 - 3:04 am


      I’ve never had the time to clean it up and improve the interface so that it’s good enough for people other than me to use, so for now you can’t get it. If enough people ask, though, maybe I’ll make it more of a priority.


  1. Queen of Pants: The JoCo Cruise Crazy 4 Ball Pits (In My Pants) | Creative Output

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