Posts Tagged Jonathan Coulton
Video: Mac singing Still Alive
Posted by Angela Brett in The Last Six Months, video on March 29, 2010
The weirdest thing happened yesterday. I was using Ayu, my as-yet-unnamed MacBook Pro, and suddenly Axis, my old PowerBook G4 booted and started singing Still Alive, the theme to the game Portal. I really should stop naming my Macs; I hear it makes them sentient.
Okay, that’s not really what happened. Actually, a couple of weekends ago, all three of the parties I had been invited to (yeah, I don’t understand how I got this social life either; just believe me) were cancelled or too difficult to get to, so I used my unexpected free time to do something I’d wanted to do for ages: get my Mac to sing Still Alive. You might remember that one weekend way back when I had an excuse to avoid being social, I wrote a parody of Still Alive, and a program to get my Mac to sing it using the TUNE input to the built-in speech synthesiser. Back then, I had to enter the notes and durations to sing one by one, and it was too tedious to do the whole song.
A birthday, a half-birthday, a video and an announcement
Posted by Angela Brett in News, The Last Six Months, video on December 3, 2009
Yesterday was Jonathan Coulton‘s birthday. Here is a collaborative video put together in about 14 days by 13 people (at least, 13 who contributed video; others contributed ideas) on his forums, as a birthday present. It’s a cover of Jonathan’s song ‘I’m Having a Party‘, with a few changes in the lyrics (and a title change to ‘We’re Having a Party’) to make it more suitable for a group of fans to sing to him. I’m posting it here because I did all the video editing (under the pseudonym Angelastic) except for the awesome tiling in the final chorus. See below for details on how this little idea blossomed into something scarily huge which was nonetheless sculpted into a less scary huge thing in the nick of time. You’ll also see why I’m a little too tired for fancy metaphors tonight.
Video: A Laptop Like You
Posted by Angela Brett in video on November 11, 2009
This is a video I made for Jonathan Coulton‘s song ‘A Laptop Like You‘. It stars my trusty PowerBook G4, which I bought in early 2005, just before moving from New Zealand to Geneva. I recently replaced it with a MacBook Pro, but my PowerBook wanted to become an internet superstar before retiring, and I just can’t say no to that sweet little thing. I love the song, I love my Mac, and I have all the right props, so I knew I had to make this video.
The song in the credits is ‘When You Go‘, also by Jonathan Coulton. His song ‘Code Monkey‘ is also referred to in this video, and a few other songs directly or tangentially related to Jonathan Coulton are referenced in the Skype userlist. Bram Tant, who valiantly confronted various Vista hassles in order to pretend to be my not-really-love-interest for about 50 seconds, and then unexpectedly got a MacBook Pro on the day he filmed his part, also makes music. He hopes his new laptop will help him record songs for the Masters of Song Fu competition.
The Future Soon, Cyborg Remix
Posted by Angela Brett in Things To Listen To on October 13, 2009
Here’s a remix I made of Jonathan Coulton‘s song, ‘The Future Soon‘, with the help of my robot choir.
For much of the song, it’s identical to the original, but Jonathan’s singing is replaced by two different MacInTalk voices at appropriate places in the song, so that he sounds more and more robotic. It starts with Alex, the newest and presumably highest-quality voice. Alex sounds a bit silly singing this high; in retrospect, perhaps I should have used the version of The Future Soon that Rob Gonzo transposed into the key of C instead.
Alex then passes the mic to Trinoids, an intentionally robotic-sounding voice which has been around at least since I got my first Mac 15 years ago. Being an old-timer, Trinoids sings a little out of time (technically speaking, it’s a MacInTalk 2 voice, and doesn’t seem to fully respect the TUNE commands), so I had to do a fair bit of post-synthesis fiddling to get it to sing at the right speed. Apart from that, since many people are annoyed by the beeps in the original, I updated them to the ’90s equivalent.
Video: Coffee pavlova recipe
Posted by Angela Brett in Recipes, video on September 6, 2009
I am working on some more writing-related things, and I encourage people who are here for the writing to go to the launch of Offshoots X (which includes my poem, Role Reversal) after the September 19 workshop but since Writing Cards and Letters finished I also have time to play with other things, such as video.
For my birthday this year, I made my favourite dessert… a New Zealand invention called a pavlova. It’s like a giant meringue which is soft in the centre. Since my friends often ask how to make one, I filmed myself making it in time-lapse mode. I also took photographs of the ingredients, mostly in multilingual Swiss packets, which might help people looking for the ingredients in French-, German- or Italian-speaking countries. I then added music and titles to create this video recipe:
King of Diamonds: Anniversary cards
Posted by Angela Brett in 52 ways to say I love you, Writing Cards and Letters on December 15, 2008
The following are variations of ‘Roses are red‘ based on the songs Jonathan Coulton wrote for his Thing a Week.
1.
Eyeballs are red,
water is blue.
Arm’s gone to hell
and so will you.
2. My Monkey
Monkey saw red,
monkey feels blue.
Bananas are yummy,
but monkey loves you.
3. W’s Duty
Let’s do our duty
to red, white, and blue.
If you do a duty
then I’ll do a poo.
4. Shop Vac
Picket fence white,
flower beds purple.
Shop vac sucks nicely,
just like the suburb’ll.
JC likes big butts,
as if he were black;
hope they were covered
before baby got back.
Violets are red,
roses are blue.
That’s clearly crazy
and so are you.
You’re not pure white,
and I’m not that green.
This can’t continue
the way that it’s been.
Jane’s wearing orange,
Joan’s wearing slate,
soon they’ll face off
and then separate.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
She’s well deflowered,
but our love was true.
25’s square,
64 cubic.
A mashup of both
released intertubic.
Some bite like redbacks
protecting their greenbacks.
Your present this Christmas
is taking the scene back.
Lobsters are red.
Once they were brown.
Don’t doubt this knowledge
when Hodgman’s around.
13. Drive
Fast cars red
Mine infrared
drive like sexy
not get dead
14. Flickr
Red Green and Blue,
or CMYK,
These pixels are free,
CC-BY-SA.
15. Resolutions
Reasoning’s solid,
guidance is clear.
These tips will bring you
An excellent year.
16. You Could Be Her
Pretzels are brown
beer is brown too.
Someone will love them,
will it be you?
17. I Will
Sugar- and heartbeats
covered in honey,
this song is sweet;
no need to be funny.
18. Dance, Soterios Johnson, Dance.
Strobe lights are green,
with reds and with blues.
When they turn off,
you’ll bring us the news.
19. So Far So Good
Roses are red,
(so far, so good)
didn’t quite last
as long as they could.
20. Curl
Dreaming of gold,
for red, white and blue,
wake from dream early,
make it come true.
Bots’ eyes are red,
Soylent is green.
Our Christmas crackers
are full of protein.
or:
Snow’s hooloovoo,
snowrocks are orange.
Our family is trapped
[MESSAGE REDACTED]
22. Take Care of Me
Roses are red,
water is blue.
Separate beside me
waiting for you.
Stories aren’t read
of days people blew.
George made it count,
and so can you.
Lavender’s purple,
mint flowers white.
Big city men
won’t treat you right.
25. Stroller Town
Stop when it’s red,
go when it’s green.
I’ve got the fastest
pram on the scene.
26. Re: Your Brains
Matters are grey,
Irises blue.
Rathole the eyes-scream,
a dinner is you.
27. Madelaine
Roses are red,
Violets are blue.
Which do you want?
It’s up to you.
28. When You Go
Roses are red
chrysanthemums white.
Flowers have withered
and nothing is right.
29. Code Monkey
Fritos are yellow
so’s Mountain Dew.
Code Monkey like them,
but mostly like you.
30. The Presidents
A whole lot of whites,
some red and some blue,
it’s time for a change
now Obama’s there too.
Most lovers’ roses are red,
French tulips are coloured like crème.
I don’t really care who she is,
as long as she has a long stem.
I’ll wait for our golden,
I’ll wait for our silver.
When she gets them both
I’ll no longer think ill of ‘er.
33. Tom Cruise Crazy
Violet are reds,
rose are blues.
Messed up and crazy,
it’s just like Tom Cruise.
Roses are red,
Raincoats are blue.
Rain-covered streets,
Jane covered you.
Roses are yellow
wine is rosé.
Think you won’t need me?
No way, Jose.
36. Not About You
Roses are red,
violets are blue,
dumped on your doorstep
’cause they’re not for you.
Young boys like toys,
old boys like drums.
Rock and roll boys
should love their mums.
Let’s show our true colours
without much ado.
Beer would be sweet,
while drinking with you.
39. Pizza Day
Maybe you’re friendless,
maybe you’re blue.
Remember, it’s Friday,
there’s pizza for you!
40. Skymall
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
These gold-dipped roses
last longer than you!
41. Seahorse
She’s getting tail,
he’s getting screwed.
Since he’s a seahorse
he’s stuck with the brood.
42. Creepy Doll
Eye is ruined,
mouth is pretty.
You should have stayed
in your big city.
43. Under The Pines
Roses are red,
suet is white.
I hope you remember
our big hairy night.
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
I know you won’t like them.
Big bad world two.
45. Mr. Fancy Pants
Your pants are rainbows,
his pants are brown.
You know that your pants
never gonna let you down.
Girls dress in pink,
Boys dress in blue.
Conceding defeat,
but all for you.
47. I’m Your Moon
Some friends are rare,
some moons are blue.
You’re here for me,
and I’m here for you.
48. The Big Boom
Something goes boom,
car alarms scream
all of these noises
are worse than they seem.
49. Make You Cry
Roses are red,
bought them for you.
Revenge is sweet:
I brought thorns too.
50. Pull the String
Roses are red,
violets are blue.
One single aphid
would eat through you.
51. Summer’s Over
Leaves turn to red,
trees’ turn to grieve,
watching them fall,
watching you leave.
52. We Will Rock You/We Are the Champions
Rose to the challenge,
vibe fifty-two.
Clap for JC
if he has rocked you.
Five of Clubs: Juratron Park
Posted by Angela Brett in CERN, Ireland, Writing Cards and Letters on November 9, 2008
If you pine for the mystery
before Noah’s ark
we’ve remade prehistory
at Juratron Park.
Come atoms, come molecules,
See what you were back then.
Come out for a frolic, you’ll
spin unperturbed again.
Those that wander can find
on our Memory Lane walks
they’re no longer confined
to a group of three quarks.
Before we were three
we were free from our tether,
and though we were free
we were closer together.
We loved antimatter,
we were one, nigh elation
to meet and to natter
’bout CP violation.
So come to a place
that’s more bright than the sun
where we’d meet face to face
‘fore they lost and we won.
Then back where you’re from,
bound together by force,
Go back to your com-
pounds, to never divorce.
We don’t all get on,
talk is charged and polemical
but each baryon
has its place in a chemical.
If protons complain
then you reach in and tell ’em, in
truth you all gain
when you’re each in your element.
You’re not vexed when you seek
unified universe
But you know you’re unique
when divided, diverse.
Make the world have this aim:
make the world we’re in different.
The more we’re the same,
the more we’re indifferent.
Still Alive
Posted by Angela Brett in News, Writing Cards and Letters on November 3, 2008
For those of you who have been refreshing your RSS feeds in a panic, wondering why no Thing has been posted yet, I am still alive. I’ve been following the original Thing-A-Weeker Jonathan Coulton around England for most of the week, with very rare internet access and only a borrowed adaptor to plug my Mac into power (which I have returned to its owner, so I only have about two hours of battery life remaining.) It’s been great fun, I’ve been travelling with several other Jonathan Coulton fans I knew from the internet. Apart from being fun people to hang out with, who have great taste in music, they and my Thing A Week deadline have done a good job of convincing me that I should get an iPhone.
As planned, I got Jonathan Coulton and his opening band Paul and Storm to pick fives of clubs, and promised them to their faces that I would write something about their chosen cards by Sunday midnight. I think perhaps it’s bad luck to do such a thing. I thought I’d have some time on Sunday to write something, but we got waylaid (at Cadbury World) on the way back to London, and I ended up not even being anywhere with internet until 1a.m, and not having time to write anything either. I do have an idea of what I will write, but I’m going to have to do it next week. I suppose I could write something tomorrow on the train, and then write something else next week, but that would only result in two low-quality hurried Things. I think that considering who picked the cards, I really should write something that’s actually good, even if only by my standards.
Jonathan Coulton missed a few weeks of his Thing A Week, so I feel I’m allowed. Though admittedly, he took a week off after the smash hit Code Monkey, whereas I took a week off after a collection of random snippets held together with gluons. But as Jonathan said: I’ll refund a dollar to all you paying subscribers [as Tom Lehrer said: of which I have none]. The rest of you will just get nothing for nothing, which seems fair.
Ten of Clubs: Still Point Five
Posted by Angela Brett in CERN, Writing Cards and Letters on September 28, 2008
This is to be sung to the tune of ‘Still Alive‘ by Jonathan Coulton. I will post a recording, and probably a video, some time in the next few days.
This isn’t TRIUMF
We’re sending a beam through CMS.
Can’t wait to see some novel interactions.
Popular Science
will call up their troubadour(k)y man
To sing in praise of all of us
and he’ll sound better than this.
But there’s no sense cheering over every beam
they’ll just keep appearing till you have an umpteen
when the celebration’s done,
do your calibration run.
Tell the crackpots they’re all still alive.
We’re not yet colliding.
But soon we’ll be lighting up the barrel
with 14 TeV of former protons
We’ll smash them to pieces
and slam every piece into a wire
except the LSP because
it will go all the way through.
Now our points of data come from crystals of lead tungstate,
and we’re out of beta we’re releasing a few years late
but the science gets done,
and more funding will come
now you’ve seen that you’re all still alive.
We’ll find the Higgs boson.
We’ll find that the answer’s forty-two.
Maybe we can even find the question.
We’ll blow up the planet.
That was a joke. ha ha, fat chance.
Anyway, this spaceplane’s great,
let’s try to make it collide.
Look at me still talking when there’s science to do
when I look up there I think I see a mu-mu.
But we need to repair
see you in the new year,
In the meantime the DAQ’s still online.
And believe me we are still online.
We’re taking cosmics and we’re still online
And when there’s beam we will be still online
And ISOLDE will be still online
Because those show-offs had beam all the time.
All the time
still online
Nitrates really are good for the heart, and Jonathan Coulton’s coming back
Posted by Angela Brett in News on June 10, 2008
It’s not often that something I say metaphorically ends up on the front page of the newspaper as the literal truth less than 48 hours later. This is what I saw when I got home this evening:
Or if you’re French, Surprise: Nitrates are good for the heart! Isn’t that what I said in last week’s Thing? Clearly I chose the right suit to post that poem in. And the right deck as well — this is indeed an intriguing development.
And as if that weren’t enough, while I was still downloading that image from my camera, I found out that Jonathan Coulton is coming Over Here again, for concerts in London and elsewhere. I booked a ticket in the panic, hopefully I’ll be able to go. Perhaps I should self-publish the spades already so I’ll have a nice shiny book to give him.
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